Dan’s men do the Dales Men
On a beautiful October Saturday the mighty Buccs travelled to one of the most picturesque rugby grounds in all of England, up in God’s own country, Wharfedale RUFC. A trip to The Dale is usually an ominous affair for The Buccs with big losses coming their way over the years and Captain Pistol Pete McGlynn stating he’d never won here In fifteen years of coming. The Buccs were also without stalwarts Tom Winch & Jack “Gilly” Gillingwater with both called up to the 1sts at late notice. With coach Zgoda being a alickadoo for the day the task of getting the men primed for action was given to Dan “backpack” Pinder, spectators watching the warm up noted it was as soft & floppy as Pinder’s manhood, things didn’t look good & to make matters worse the new player/coach had left the Buccs shirts at home! The extremely nice Vice Chairman of Wharfedale David Baker hastily sorted for the Buccs to borrow The Dalesmen’s away strip of red & white hoops and The Buccs were back in business.
Kick off... Wharfedale do what they do best, play straight and direct rugby with wave after wave of big men coming down channels and after five minutes The Buccs were 7 - 0 down! From the sideline stern but positive words were heard from Pistol and Backpack underneath the sticks but the crowd wondered if these words were futile…..they were not!!!! From the restart The Buccs decided to sack off the 1st team moves of Red and yellow and pink and green,Purple and orange and blue,I can sing a rainbow,Sing a rainbow,Sing a rainbow too and decided to match The Dale at their own game playing it straight, hard and direct! Now wave after wave of Buccs big men started the charge with the full pack taking the ball on like mad men! After five minutes of sustained pressure Jacob Edwards playing at ten used his dancing feet to shimmy through The Dale defence and get The Buccs first score he duly converted his own try!! Game on! For the next ten minutes it was an all action affair with both teams going at each other hammer and tong! Big carries from Brad Parker, Walker, Dawson, Bob Ross Dearing, Platten, Thornton, Pinder & Robson got The Buccs up the field but with this type of ferocity being played something had to give & Josh Parker took a big knock and had to come off, some say it was because he took a bang to his eye but some say he spotted his girlfriend being chatted up by a dishy Dalesman, and went off to investigate, who knows?? But The Buccs had an able replacement with 1st team speedster Jake Boardman coming onto the wing and big Paul Evison moving into the centres! Pretty much with his first touch Jake skipped and danced past would be defenders hit the afterburners and flew into the corner to score The Buccs second try, conversion missed but 7 - 12 up! This sprung Wharfedale back into action after a very stern “team talk” by their coach! They kept coming and coming and finally their diminutive fly half slipped & skipped through a gap and went in from twenty metres to convert his own try 14 - 12 but no panic from The Buccs just positivity and words of “we’ve got this fellas” With a few minutes left of the half The Buccs marched up the field and were camped in the Dale 22 when the ref called a penalty for high tackle and a subsequent yellow card for a Dalesman, did The Buccs opt for shot at goal, or a scrum where they were having great success or even a line out where they weren’t not, no did they heckers they called a Sarries move!! For the second time in two matches the move worked a treat and the old rascal himself Captain McGlynn scurried over with Jacob converting 14 - 19 to the Buccs & half time was called.
The half time team talk was all about sticking to what The Buccs were doing well and continuing to take it to The Dale! The second half continued in the same vain as the first, two teams going at each other but the difference was the beautiful kicking game of the Edwards brothers who when they aren’t arguing are developing into two fine young rugby players. It must be noted it’s wonderful to see three sets of brothers playing for The Buccs, the Parker’s, the Edwards' & the Pinder’s! Every time The Dale got close to The Buccs line someone would steal a ball from a ruck and Alex or Jacob would boot the ball down the field giving The Buccs a morale booster and The Dale the sense of perhaps just perhaps this might not be their day! After sustained pressure and a smart kicking game The Buccs found themselves with a scrum just outside The Dale 22 and from another fantastic scrum Jacob Edwards hit big Paul Evison on a peach of a line & the big fella sprinted over the try line untouched from 25 metres out, Edwards converted again 14 - 26 to The Buccs! There was a genuine sense of excitement on the sideline that this could be a special day for The Buccs but also that nervousness that The Dale are no mugs and they’d not give up so easily! Another stern team talk from the Dale head coach and again The Dalesmen kept coming at The Buccs but the defence from The Buccs was superb with tough nut Josh Dawson leading from the front with some truly thunderous tackles. With 5 minutes to go play took The Buccs just outside of The Dales 22, Jack Walker cut a glorious inside line and with telepathy that he’s gained from playing with Alex Edwards for many years in the Ionians mini juniors, colts, Buccs & Hymers teams Alex hit him with a cheeky out the back inside pass and Jack stormed through the 22 and went over untouched! Jacob slotting another conversion and 14 - 33 to the mighty Buccs!! By now the Dale knew they were defeated and no matter what they did The Buccs had an answer for it! The last play of the game was aptly a turn over by Pistol and the ref blew the whistle to end the match and give The Buccs a famous victory!! Every player put in a barnstorming performance but a notable mention must go to new Buccs prop Adam Thornton, is this lad the find of the season? Can carry, scrumage and likes to sing with his knob out! Marvellous stuff! It was decided Jake Boardman was MOTM for having a superb attitude coming as 1st team travelling reserve then shooting over to help The Buccs and bring experience, pace and bagging a try! Dick of the day…… hmmm you could say it was Josh Parker for bringing his bird on the bus! With big Mike Mel saying WTF the whole bus trip up to Wharfedale but it was decided it would of course be Alex “Smeg” Edwards for attempting a chip kick five metres out from The Dale try line! Mike Mel would have deffo said WTF! However young Edwards is catching the eye of the 1st team coaches and players at training and Dan Zgoda was asked after the match “did Alex Edwards play well, his mum’s a bit of milf isn’t she, is she single?” Unfortunately the only answer he could give was “yes, yes & no”
We move on to Sandal next week.
Up The Buccs!